I think the thing for me is I feel overwhelmed with information, but not the right information, if that even makes sense. I feel like I am so grateful that there are conversations and that perimenopause and menopause is in the spotlight, but I also feel so aggressively sold to and everything. And so I feel like I need a trusted resource. I feel like lost in the woods, right? So that’s one thing I’m coming up against is like this feeling of like, if there’s like a supplement for everything, and who knows what’s in the supplement or there’s, you know, so many things that air quotes you should be doing. And it’s this rush to optimize yourself versus nurture or care for yourself. And it’s like hard for me to have discernment. So I’m like, where’s my guide? You know, so that’s part of how I feel overwhelmed in this moment.
So I had breast cancer four and a half years ago, which was hormone positive breast cancer. So that means I’m not a candidate for HRT. Which, there’s part of me too, ’cause everybody’s like, ‘Just go on HRT,’ you’re not HRT. And I’m like, I can’t get on HRT. That’s my, my inner happy lady. Journaling. Yeah, that’s exactly, that’s my, I’m journaling. Yeah. Great. I’m sure. Oh, is it wonderful? Is it great? Oh, good. Yeah. Yeah.
But then there’s even conflicting things about that, and I think more than anything I’m just feeling like extremely let down by the medical field and my Kaiser OB who has 15 minutes to talk to me at any given time, and, yeah, I think the things, I’ve been really lucky in a lot of ways because I think, I feel like symptomatically, like my biggest things that are happening are, like my hair is, is really drastically thinning, which is always, every time I take a shower I’m like, whoa. Interesting. And of course there’s like a million supplements for that, but I’m like, ugh, is that really?And then the other thing too is pelvic floor stuff. I was like, oh, interesting. I’ll just get up and it’s like an eyedropper pee came outta my body. Why? Like, what is happening? So there, I have a pelvic floor special or PT person that I’ll see through Kaiser, but they are not available. This is just my laundry list of things.
The other big thing for me too, so I’m 47. I haven’t had a period in over a year, but, so I’m also in this gray zone, right? Because I had like literally like maybe a spot of blood during this year long period. So it’s like, are you in menopause? Are you in perimenopause? So for somebody who likes to in my life, like do things the right way, and have information and make a decision and know what something is, I just literally feel like all lost in the woods. And that is my story.